Sunday, May 6, 2007

Was it too much?

Due to the lack of responses, I'm afraid I scared everyone away . I wasn't trying to. I just felt like sharing what has happened to me, so I did.

It's the story of me. It's the story of my struggles. Quite frankly, it's a shitty story, but it happened and it's real and I've struggled long and hard to realize that it wasn't my fault and that I shouldn't feel ashamed or embarrassed about it.

Then, there is the religious aspect of my story. I know religion can be a touchy subject. I just struggle so much with this issue, between my feelings about all that's happened to me vs. the beliefs of my childhood/young adult faith. And the constant conflict within myself about this issue and my family pressures in relationship to it.

I shared all this, hoping you'd share your advice with me. Don't be afraid to tell me what you really think. Please give me your words of wisdom. I really want to hear what you have to say. After all, it's all about the truth of the matter.

I'm sorry if you felt it was too much. It's just the truth. And sometimes the truth, well sometimes the truth just sucks.


Karen said...

I am proud of you for sharing it, and I think many of us...ok, well me...I felt that there wasn't much I could say. What a horrible experience for you...and what an amazing gift Ike was and is to your life. I know it can be hard to understand why things happen the way they do...I struggle with that too.

Nikki said...

Please don't feel because I didn't respond that you scared me away. It was very brave (and I know hard) to put it all out there like you did and I didn't respond for the same reason as Karen - I just didn't know what to say. I completely understand your struggles with religion and would never think less of you for feeling the way you do. Even now I just don't know what to say...

Stacy Armstrong ~ Come on in, The Studio is Open ~ said...

Oh, Rox Rox Rox......I'm so proud of you for sharing. Its good therapy. I've been worried and thinking about you all day. In my head I've been searching for the right words to say.
Pick up the phone and call me! I'd love to hear your voice and make sure you are okay!! Will you do that??

Beth said...

Like everyone else, I was speechless... That was a horrible thing to happen to you and you will probably never know why. Some people are just evil. But you have made a wonderful life for yourself with Ike and the children and it can only get better. ( I hope the s.o.b. is getting the punishment he deserves.)

mandy said...

I'm amazed at your ability to be so open. I think it is theraputic to be honest but hard. You are incredible and an inspiration to others who have been abused! Keep your chin up...I truly believe that God only gives us as much as we can handle...and it just shows how strong and capable He thinks you are!

Anonymous said...

I'm thinkin' that you've done a good thing for yourself by sharing this with us. I'm thinkin' that you are an excellent communicator...eloquent, and always poised. I'm thinkin' that you could give a kick ass testimony if you ever got up the nerve...for a youth group at a church or other organization. Ya know, you've got a whole lot of livin' ahead of you, I'll bet God has huge plans for you! (really!) I just don't think He's gonna let you be've got 'it' ya know? You're a star!
(Besides, if you keep all that crap inside, you'll explode, and darnit, that would be soooo much messier than a flooded house! hee hee) love ya girl!

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